The Ploktacard(TM)

Plokta has always prided itself on being at the cutting edge of fannish developments. Thus we are thrilled to be the world's first fanzine to offer an affinity card -- the PLOKTACARDTM. After all, Trekkies have had one for years. And, as a reader of Plokta, we know that you are a person of taste and discernment. Well, either that or you're about to be featured in the Great Plokta Mailing List Cull.

The PLOKTACARDTM offers a range of benefits which we consider to be unparalleled. As a cardholder, all of the following facilities would be available to you.

Sadly, due to tedious legal difficulties, you cannot actually use your PLOKTACARDTM to buy anything or to get any form of credit. But we think this pales into insignificance when compared with the other merits of the card.


Yes, when you apply for the PLOKTACARDTM, you can choose from this range of tasteful card designs produced for our exclusive use by Sue 'No More Sodding Moose' Mason.

l. Emperor penguins basking on an Antarctic Idyll 2. The Enchanted Duplicator 3. Clangers, including the Soup Dragon.
Penguins Duplicator Clanger

4. A chipmunk in cyberwear. 5. A moose wearing a nun's habit skipping over the Austrian Tyrol. With edelweiss.
Penguins Duplicator

Of course, we can't make these unprecedented benefits available to just anyone. Like any self-respecting affinity card, we operate a credit scoring system. In our case, it's street-credit scoring. Please fill in the following questionnaire which has been designed using the latest interactive customer focused psychological techniques.

Have you voted in the Novas? Have you sent a loc to Plokta?
Yes Yes
No No
What's a Nova? What's a loc?
I come from Leeds. I come from Leeds.

What's your view of superfluous technology? How did you get into fandom?
You can have too much of a good thing. I joined the BSFA.
I had one once but I threw it away. I came to the Eastercon.
It can't be superfluous if it's technology. Greg Pickersgill sent me a bunch of old fanzines.
I subscribe to T3. I went to a media con, but I don't like to talk about that these days.
I come from Leeds. I come from Leeds.

Who's your favourite Babylon 5 character? How are you at the Astral Pole?
Ivanova Can do it quickly
Sheridan Can do it on a good day
What's a Babylon 5? I am D West
This is a serious piece of televisual SF and it's ludicrous to talk about favourite characters. I am Pat McMurray
What's an Astral Pole?

Which card design do you want?
Enchanted Duplicator

Your email address:

[You won't be added to any mailing list, and your email address will not be passed on to anyone outside the Plokta cabal.]

Now return this questionnaire with your name and address to Plokta HQ, and if your street-credit score is sufficiently high a PLOKTACARDTM will be yours.

-- Mike Scott

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